A Prescription for Cinematic Amnesia

Ever have this experience when you can't remember any movies you've watched in the past few months? Like, someone will ask you if you've seen any good movies recently and you draw a complete blank? Even though you know that you've seen and enjoyed quite a few in that time period?

I hate it when that happens, so perhaps for the sake of my own sanity, I'll periodically just jot down the movies I've watched, here on this blog. The following are the ones that I watched over winter break.

A Man and A Woman (Un Homme et Une Femme)

A movie for the senses. Beautifully shot, especially the blue tones. And the voiceovers sound as though someone is whispering into your ear. A really barebones story, but if you're more into character and atmosphere than plot, this is a good movie, especially since it clocks in at a pretty breezy 102 min. It also has that really famous theme song that you've probably heard but never knew where it came from. I don't really understand why there were those long race car driving sequences though. I know that the guy is professional driver, but some of those sequences seemed gratuitous.

From cool blue wash...

To a nostalgic sepia tone

Strangers on a Train

I've never been a big fan of Alfred Hitchcock. Out of all his movies, I think I like The Birds the best because there's not as much hamfisted pop psychology and is just a creepy movie about birds going berserk for some reason. Strangers on a Train was okay, but I thought that the actor who played the good guy was a bad actor. And the villain was perhaps just one prance away from being campy.

Still not a Hitchcock booster.

Brief Encounter

Oh good, after watching this movie, I won't have to think of The Seven Year Itch when I hear Rachmaninoff. As you can probably tell, I didn't like that movie much. Something about having to watch an old guy lust after Marilyn Monroe and feeling manipulated to sympathize with him just wasn't that entertaining.

Anyway though, I liked Brief Encounter though. I loved how painfully ordinary it was. The protagonist is a plain housewife whose highlight of the week is taking the train on Thursdays to go watch movies by herself. The man she meets is a doctor. Neither of them are that wealthy, glamorous, or beautiful. In fact, they're almost your stereotypical dowdy British people. Which is what makes their short-lived romance more affecting. Richard Linklater must've seen this movie before making Before Sunrise. That just goes to show you that no matter if you're repressed post-war British citizens or Gen X drifters, you can always find love on a train.

Kiki's Delivery Service

This movie is similar to Whisper of the Heart and Spirited Away in that it's about a young girl who has to overcome her own fears and insecurities. But what made Whisper of the Heart special to me was how beautifully mundane it was. The story is little more than about a young girl who gets a crush on a fellow student and also tries to write her first story. Yet somehow, the movie makes us invest our feelings and empathy into Shizuku, the heroine. And Spirited Away is its exact opposite in terms of realism, unless you live in a world where talking radishes and giant babies are everyday sights and evil big-headed witches constantly try to enslave you in their bathhouses.

Kiki's Delivery Service sits in between as a fantasy rooted in realism, which didn't work as well for me. Perhaps if those two other movies hadn't existed, I would've liked Kiki's Delivery Service more. And as per Studio Ghibli, the animals are adorable and full of personality.

Aww...

Blue Marriage

Lee Yeon Hee! Okay, I'll admit that I was really excited about this movie because Lee Yeon Hee was in it and she's #3 on my Korean girl list. Happily, it was watchable and pleasant enough. The story revolves around 4 couples who are all about to get married but face their own issues. One couple has to deal with each others' pasts. Another has issues with routine and boredom. Another has problems because they're actually in a shotgun wedding. And the last one has to come to terms with insecurity.

I found two of the stories to be more compelling than the others. First, Gun Ho and Vika were interesting because it dealt with the issue of foreign brides in Korea (Vika is from Uzbekistan). It also dealt with the story realistically, making Gun Ho deeply worried that he is just being used for citizenship purposes. It didn't just Hollywoodize the story where the middle-aged schlubby guy gets the hot girl just because.

And So Mi's story was good too, and not just because it involves Lee Yeon Hee walking around Jeju Island in a blue dress. Her story deals with the troublesome issue of complacency and stagnation, and how even if a couple is as picturesque as her and her fiance (played by 2PM's Taecyeon), there still needs to be some spark and passion in the relationship.

Winter Break: Foods From Seoul

With 3 weeks off for break, I had just enough time to choose to either settle in comfortably at home or perhaps go traveling for a bit. I chose the former, which meant that I stayed in Seoul, met with friends, ate my favourite foods that I missed, and worked on some personal projects that I had neglected due to school. So because everybody loves to read about and look at food, I thought I'd just write about some of my favourite things that I got to eat this break. Most of these foods are pretty common, so I'm not saying anything revelatory or illuminating, though if you're not Korean, some of these things may be unfamiliar to you.

Unfortunately, most of the pictures here weren't taken by me. I always try to take my own food pics, but this time around, I guess I was too busy trying to eat everything that I couldn't take 5 seconds to snap any pics.


Chuncheon Dakgalbi (Chicken galbi)

This was perhaps what I was most looking forward to enjoying. It's a common enough food in Seoul, but pretty hard to find in the U.S.. I remember the first time I ever ate this, I was a bit confused because I thought that by "dakgalbi," I would just be eating chicken cutlets marinated in galbi sauce. But instead, what we got was a big circular iron griddle pan in the middle of the table, upon which a heap of chicken, cabbage, potatoes, rice cakes, and a large dollop of red sauce were placed.

I have to admit that I wasn't too crazy about this dish at first. It was all right, at best. But after I ate it a few more times, I started to warm up to it. It's very flavourful and a little spicy, though not overpoweringly so. Now, it's one of the things I crave the most when I go back home. Unfortunately, many of my close friends there don't like dakgalbi that much. I actually almost missed out on eating this because of that reason. Luckily, I was able to go with a friend on my last day in town!

Perhaps the best part of this dish is that even after you're supposedly done eating, you're not! If you leave some leftovers, you can order some rice and they'll mix it in with whatever's left on the pan for some delicious dakgalbi fried rice.

Sujebi

This was my first time having real sujebi. I had had small portions before as side dishes at some Korean restaurants, but my friends assured me that they weren't close to the real thing. When I went to Samcheongdong with a friend of mine, I wanted to try this seemingly simplistic food that consists of flat, thin pieces of rice cakes in a rich broth.

It was one of those foods that I thought couldn't make for a full meal, but I was absolutely stuffed by the end. The taste was similar to that of kalguksu, or maybe ddeokguk (rice cake soup that all Koreans eat on New Year's). I liked the texture of the rice cakes, which were almost like thick sheets of paper.


Samgyeopsal (Pork belly)

I wanted to enjoy a night of an unabashed bingeing on pork and soju, so I got together with a group of dudes and went to Sinsa to do just that. I remember the first time that my mom fried up some samgyeopsal for me, many years ago. Frankly, I was a bit put off by the taste of fatty and uncured pork, especially since I was used to marinated meats when it came to Korean food. But now, it's probably my favourite thing to eat when at a Korean BBQ joint.

I also took a couple of non-Korean college friends who were visiting to Hongdae to eat samgyeopsal and galbi. They loved Korean BBQ but didn't quite know how to eat it. Just for future reference, all those little dishes full of greens and such can be consumed at once if you want! I don't like to think of "proper vs. improper" ways of eating things, but I do think that there are ways to eat that make food definitely taste better. And eating Korean BBQ by utilizing all of the lettuce wraps, ssamjang (sauce), roasted garlic, and roasted kimchi makes for an infinitely more satisfying experience.


Ggot deung shim (Beef sirloin)

A generous friend of mine took me out to a restaurant called 무등산 (Moo Deung San) in Cheongdam for some ggot deung shim, which is beef sirloin (I think). It's unmarinated and uncured, so it's just pure meat flavour, which you can enhance with some salt, pepper, and olive oil. I said before that pork is still my favourite meat when it comes to Korean BBQ, but it's always a nice change of pace to try beef as well.


Yangnyum Pork (Marinated pork)

Saemaeul Shikdang is one of the places that you can probably find on every other corner in Seoul. It's a very unpretentious BBQ chain that's well-known for its marinated pork and kimchi jjigae (kimchi stew). It was also the place that my co-worker friends and I would go to often after work or for hweshik (company dinner), so I have a lot of good memories and sentiments associated with this place.

The yangnyum pork is my favourite because it's hard to find a similar dish elsewhere, at least in my experience. The meat is thinly sliced, which gives it a deliciously light quality. But it also means that it cooks quickly and burns easily, so you need to pay attention to the grill. And of course, the kimchi jjigae is very good, and I don't even like kimchi jjigae that much.

The fire also is good for warming your hands on a cold January night!

Salted Mackerel

Korean-style salted mackerel is one of my favourite foods. It's really simple but so tasty. I like mine very salty and kind of dry. A couple of winters ago, I went to an alley in Dongdaemun that had all these restaurants that served up all kinds of fish that were roasted on an open fire right in front of you. I want to go back there next time I go home.


Mandu (Dumplings)

Dumplings are the ultimate comfort food. They're good, available everywhere, and they just look so cute, don't they? Though I prefer Chinese-style dumplings (xiao long bao is my favourite food, after all), Korean dumplings, aka mandu, are very good as well. I love how each type of dumpling endearingly has its own unique shape.


Cup ramen

There's just something indescribably good about eating instant ramen out of a styrofoam bowl. I love Shin ramen and the like, but there are times when I just want cup ramen and nothing else will do. I never went to school in Korea, so I don't have the nostalgia of eating cup ramen at convenience stores with my friends. Even then, there's something very comforting about eating something that only requires hot water to prepare.


Korean ramen

When I think of Japanese ramen, I think of Ippudo. When I think of Korean ramen, I think of Shin ramen. So it was a new experience to try non-instant Korean-style ramen at this place right off of Garosugil. It was pretty good, though I'll always be partial to the instant kind most of the time.


Hanchu/Kkanbu

Hanchu

Kkanbu

Though obviously not native to South Korea, I can't imagine many other places that have better fried chicken than here. I went to Hanchu for its pepper-infused fried chicken, as well as its fried stuffed peppers. I ordered from Kkanbu, a chain restaurant, because one appeared within walking distance from my apartment (yay!) and it has more American-style fried chicken.


Gamjatang

When I first heard of gamjatang, I thought it was a kind of potato stew because that's what gamja means in Korean. Or maybe there's a more obscure definition that I'm not aware of. Anyway, if it does mean "potato stew," it must've been some kind of bait-and-switch tactic to trick vegetarians into ordering it because it's really a red stew with big hunks of pork bones and meat.


Spicy galbi-jjim (Braised galbi)

This was my second time to this restaurant, 매운 갈비야. It wasn't as spicy as I remembered it, though there are about 5 levels of spiciness and we may have ordered a lower level than last time. Galbi-jjim isn't my favourite, but having it once in a while is good, especially if it makes you sweat on a cold winter night.

My Love From Another Star: New Crack Drama!

I like to consider myself a person of my times, but I'm not always "with it." Take music, for example. I wish I could say that I keep up with current music, but I mainly listen to what has now become my college soundtrack. I once listened to "What Makes You Beautiful" and thought, 'Wow, what a catchy new song!' In 2013.

Greatest computer game
of all time

Or computer games. I've pretty much stopped playing games made past the mid-2000s, and I look all the way back to 1998 as the pinnacle era of gaming. Half-Life, Starcraft, Fallout 2, Thief: The Dark Project, and Grim Fandango? Come on, game over.

And as for TV shows, I've rarely ever followed a show as it was concurrently airing. Last season's Game of Thrones was an exception. And this year, with Breaking Bad, though I had watched all 4.5 seasons before the home stretch, I let the final half-season pass me by until I rushed to catch up at around the series finale time. Same thing with Korean dramas. Every time I've started a show, I've had the option to marathoning it because the series was over, often by a number of years. I could go as quickly or as slowly as I liked.

With Man From The Stars, I'm experiencing for the first time what it's like to have to wait while being in the dark about what will happen next. It's thoroughly frustrating because Man From The Stars is a very good show and I haven't experienced a "crack drama" like this since History of the Salaryman from a few years back. It's been a while since I've felt compelled to watch 5+ straight hours of a show, but this one made me do it.

Opening intro from the show

Man From The Stars (also known as You Who Came From The Stars) is romantic comedy about a 400+ year old alien who falls in love with a superstar actress. Yes, this was a concept that could've gone very badly very easily. I admit that, based on its paper pitch, I most likely wouldn't have watched it had I not seen a few scenes in passing on TV. As odd and silly as a central premise may be, it's hard to turn away Jun Ji Hyun and Kim Soo Hyun are on screen together, shot in beautiful hi-definition.

Jun Ji Hyun is more than just a pretty face... She's really funny too

Kim Soo Hyun isn't too bad-looking either, and he can hold his own against JJH

The basic story is that Do Min Joon (DMJ, played by Kim Soo Hyun) is actually an alien who got stranded on Earth about 400 years ago in Joseon Korea. He has incredible powers, including super strength, the ability to teleport, and the useful skill of freezing time for everyone except himself. However, he has learned to live life quietly (until the day he can finally leave) so as to not attract attention and to not interfere in the lives of others, especially since he believes in fate and wants to let things happen as they are meant to happen. He's kind of like Isolationist Superman.

CSY and DMJ are next door neighbours and they constantly fight

Flash forward to modern day Korea. DMJ has accumulated vast wealth and knowledge over the centuries and now works as a professor, which is belied by his youthful appearance since he hasn't visibly aged. Meanwhile, Chun Song Yi (CSY, played by Jun Ji Hyun) is the biggest female star in Korea who is far from the graceful and elegant beauty that her management company tries to portray her as. Despite all efforts by her managers, she constantly and publicly reveals herself to be vain, ignorant, and foul-tempered. Somehow, just as DMJ has found an opportunity to return to his home planet, he and CSY meet and potentially complicates his desire to leave, especially since she greatly resembles a girl whom DMJ fell in love with 400 years ago.

You can tell you're watching a bad drama when you don't even care to root for the protagonists. Perhaps you even want them to fail because they constantly in stupid, torpid, or unrealistic fashion. And you can tell you're watching a good drama when you become invested in even the secondary or tertiary characters.

DMJ and Lawyer Jang's conversations are some of my favourite in the show

Man From The Stars does the latter. There are the likes of Lawyer Jang, who is DMJ's sole friend and confidant. Even though Lawyer Jang is now an old man and DMJ is actually several centuries old, they interact almost like schoolboys and it's very funny. Also, there's Hwi-Kyung, who's far more entertaining than the typical second male lead because he's such a sheltered ditz. And there's Miss Hong, the unfortunate proprietor of a comic book store who's forced to serve the same 2 ill-mannered geeks who haunt her establishment 24/7.

But the main attraction (and not just physically) is the chemistry between the two leads. Relative status is important in Korean society, but it's completely upended here because while DMJ is much older and more learned than CSY, he looks barely older than a college student. Meanwhile, CSY is a superstar celebrity who is supposedly older. But she's also much more childish compared to him (being 400 years younger tends to do that), not to mention much less knowledgable about everything.

More bickering ensues

If you've seen the movie The Thieves, you'd have seen a similar romance dynamic between Jun Ji Hyun and Kim Soo Hyun, except he was much more lovestruck in that role. I think the makers of this drama wanted to capitalize on that chemistry, and it's been working well so far.

Not only that, but the character of CSY on her own is awesome as well. As mentioned before, she has a lot of personality flaws, but she's also loyal, honest, and not afraid to speak her mind. She reminds me of some of my favourite K-drama heroines like Kim Sam Soon (from My Name is Kim Sam Soon) and Baek Yeo Chi (from History of the Salaryman). Watching her get angry or cranky is one of funniest parts of the show.

So if you're looking for a big, expensive, and star-laden Korean drama and don't want to have to resort to watching The Heirs (sorry, can't help but hate), give Man From The Stars a try.

DMJ has the pimpest apartment ever

PS If people are wondering where they can watch all these dramas that I talk about, go to www.viki.com. The availability and video quality are great, and they all have subtitles (for any non-Koreans).

PPS Kim Soo Hyun is very good at rocking the skinny tie. I am very envious.

Retracing steps

Once I graduate from school, I will no longer have these lengthy breaks to come home that often. With that knowledge, I think I've been trying to "take it in" more this time around. After this winter break and maybe the next, who knows when I'll have a chance to just relax here like this?

Fully healthy now and with no academic obligations in sight, I've been getting out of the apartment more instead of just checking things off my movies-to-watch list (crossed off now: A Man and a Woman, Strangers on a Train, and Brief Encounter). A few days ago, I took the bus all the way to the Apgujeong/Sinsa area, which is the place I used to work a few years ago while I was in Korea. I often took the bus there because unlike the subway, I didn't have to change rides.

I always preferred the bus to the subway. In the summer, it's cold like a fridge, and in the winter, it's warm as a blanket. Yes, the drivers tend to turn the corners a bit too abruptly. But most of the time, you can just grab one of those captain seats and get your own little tour of the city. The best seat is the one right behind the wheel because you can put your feet up a little.

That was where I used to work. I remember when I first started out, I was just so happy to have somewhere to go where I was needed. Before that, being in Korea was kind of like ceasing to exist for a while as I was removed from my friends in the U.S. and I knew very few people here. Of course now, I love having nothing to do here because I've become much more familiar with this place and can find lots to do, but back then, having a job was the most exciting thing ever.

Here's the neighbourhood cafe that I went to almost every day in between that time I left my job and was waiting to enroll in school again. My parents are going to move soon, so this time will probably be my last chance to visit there again. Maybe next time, the place will have shut down or moved elsewhere. I went there a few days ago, but the owner couldn't quite recognize me with my wool cap on. She eyed me curiously, and I wasn't sure if she knew I was or not. As soon as I took it off, she remembered who I was.

The Galleria! This was what I passed every time I took the bus home from Apgujeong. It also reminds me of that brief internship I did at a luxury goods firm, which mostly required me to run errands around the city in cabs. I never realized how many different brands of high-end watches there were. I thought it all began and ended with Rolex, but there are only about maybe 50 others. At that time, I wished that I would be faced with a trivia night question that asked us to name as many luxury watchmakers as we could, and I'd be one of the few who'd be able to whip out all these brands that nobody's heard of. But then I would've looked like a complete tool.

Here's a popular type of self-serving bar where you just help yourself to any beer that you want. Then at the end of the night, you bring the bottles up to the front and you pay by the bottle. The selection is pretty good and it's probably the cheapest way to drink imported beers in Seoul.

A little less than 2 weeks left. Want to do as much as possible.

Drama Reviews, Pt. 4

So I've been back home for 5 days now but thanks to a final paper and a mysterious illness/allergy, I've been indoors-bound for almost all this time. So that means watching a lot of TV.

Heirs

Sigh... Shin Hye, you're my favourite girl, so why can't you ever be in something that I like? You're Beautiful was annoying, Heartstrings was pointless, and Flower Boy Next Door was promising but so slow in the beginning that I couldn't keep going.

I really wanted to like Heirs, so much so that I was willing to completely overlook its excruciating first couple of episodes that largely take place in California. I will give credit to the show in that physically, the on-location shoots look beautiful. At least the superficial aspects are top-notch. But throw in some really bad non-Korean actors and Lee Min Ho's, um, inadequate English and suddenly, this lavish and expensive production seems cheap.

Lee Min Ho and the Castoffs of "Laguna Beach"

I'd never want to be one of those people who jumps on foreign actors for not being fluent in English. God knows how terrible Hollywood actors would sound if they had to speak Chinese or Arabic. It's just a totally unearned luck of the draw that they happened to have been born into speaking the lingua franca of the world, so it speaks nothing to their personal merit or talents.

But it's still a jarring experience when you see the main character, the one who has been exiled from Korea since childhood and seems to hang out with mostly with blonde Californians, speak perfectly fluent Korean while reciting English phonetically.

As I said though, I was willing to overlook all that because I understand how difficult language barriers can be. What's less acceptable is that the story doesn't improve much when the setting shifts back to Korea. There's a whole lot of nothing. Wait, that's not true. There's a whole lot of overwrought, swelling music when characters we don't really care or know about stare at each other. Intensely. That we have plenty of.

An everyday girl with the everyday problem of being fought over
by multiple hot rich dudes for no readily discernible reason

What's weird is that the cast consists of pretty much an A-list of all the popular young stars and starlets in Korea. It's the equivalent of a Hollywood movie starring Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Robert Pattinson, and Miley Cyrus. Yet nobody really acts young. It's like taking a young and energetic cast and making them behave as if they're in Days of Our Lives. What's the point then?

The one thing that I really liked was Krystal's character, who's this very clingy and self-centered brat but she's adorably and sincerely so.

By around episode 6, the story was just rehashing Boys Over Flowers, and there wasn't much more to hope for. So that's when I stopped.

Answer Me 1994

I loved Answer Me 1997, so I was both excited for and wary of this installment in the series. The thing is that the original drama was never expected to be a hit, so I was skeptical of this sudden decision to expand the franchise. It seemed as though they were just trying to quickly capitalize on unexpected success, as opposed to telling a story that that they actually wanted to tell.

Some of the symptoms of the former are here. For one, the flashback narrative framework is back again, including the whole, "Who's the mystery husband?" riddle. The parents are played by the same actors, which would be great if they weren't the exact same characters in behavior and temperament. The up-and-down relationship between the dad and the daughter was funny and fresh the first time, but this time, we've seen it all before so the effect is much more muted.

Maybe I shouldn't have stopped when I did, because from the reviews that I've read, the show is very good. But I don't know, it was just too familiar and wasn't compelling enough in its own right. Even though many of the characters between 1997  and 1994 were similar, I still vastly preferred the ones from 1997. I liked Jung Eun Ji's version of the stalker-fan teenage heroine more than Go Ara's version of the stalker-fan teenage heroine, and so forth.

The Prime Minister and I

After giving up on Heirs, I was in search of a new show. And since History of the Salaryman was my second favourite drama of all time, and its star was Lee Beom Soo and he was also in The Prime Minister and I, I figured that there was a decent chance that I'd like this show too.

And I do! The Prime Minister and I takes a familiar plot concept—the fake, contractual marriage—and puts its own spin on it by pairing the much older Lee Beom Soo with real-life pop queen Yoona. It's a coupling that put me off at first, but the show makes it work by recognizing the incongruence of such a pairing. In the drama, Lee Beom Young is a Mr. Smith-type of politician, one who is feverishly committed to principles and doing right, often at the expense of other things such as his own family. Yoona is a tabloid journalist whose main concerns have to do with celebrity relationships and scandals.

Naturally, they're just made for each other, right?

Lee Beom Soo has moved up in life, going from a lowly and unskilled
wage-earner in "History of the Salaryman" to a prime minister now

The circumstances that force them to enter into a fake relationship-then-marriage aren't terribly realistic, but the actors play the characters with enough emotional investment that it's believable enough to sustain the storyline.

Now, Lee Beom Soo is a great actor whom you'd always expect quality performances from. But here, Yoona actually does a good job as well. Her character is fun, charming, ambitious, self-aware, and a little bit devious, almost reminding me of a heroine from a Miyazaki movie. It's also great that I don't have to fear that she'll suffer from TV-land stupidity, which is when characters (often female ones) are made to act bizzarely or irrationally just to prolong the story or maintain the drama's tension.

Yoona makes hipster clothes look cute instead of insult-inducing

At this point, there've only been 4 episodes, so I can only hope that this drama's quality remains as high as it is now. And while it's fun watching opposites like the Steel-Rod-Spine Prime Minister and the Frivolous Tabloid Girl begin to shed prejudices against one another, I don't know if I want them to end up together. It's not that bigger age gaps haven't been overcome in real life, it's just that I don't want this drama to be the one where the middle-aged guy gets with the pop princess half his age. But I will be impressed if the drama has me rooting for the couple towards the end.

Korea draws Belgium, Russia, and Algeria for the 2014 World Cup

This was my first time actually watching the World Cup draw, and though it was confusing as hell, I was completely spellbound when they started drawing from Pot 3. I thought it'd be cool if Korea got drawn into Group A because we'd get all the added exposure of playing the host nation, Brazil. But that's probably too much pressure against too talented a team, though this is probably one of the most uncertain (though laden with potential) Brazilian teams in quite a while.

I was anxiously hoping to avoid Group D because it already had Uruguay and Italy and looked certain to be a Group of Death. When the paper was unrolled and I saw that the name of the country consisted of more than one word, I was ready to shout out some curses. But thankfully, it turned out to be Costa Rica. Considering that the other team in that group turned out to be England, it is a huge relief that Korea managed to stay out of that group.

I have to feel bad for Australia, though I have a grudge against that team because I remember when they joined the Asian Football Confederation from the Oceania Football Conference back in 2007 and they were all cocky as shit for no real good reason, thinking they'd run roughshod over their Asian opponents. The fact that they've won absolutely zero continental tournaments since then has greatly humbled them, but I still sort of enjoy watching them struggle. Still, it's a death sentence to be grouped with Spain, the Netherlands, and Chile, so I do feel for them. This randomized process can be really unfair and ruin years of hard work.

I'm delighted that Japan is in a relatively easy group as well with Colombia, Greece, and Côte d'Ivoire. Both Korea and Japan progressed to the Round of 16 in 2010, and that helped build up the respect and credibility of Asian football. I hope the two leading Asian teams can do it once again.

And let's not forget about Iran! They actually drew into a group that greatly resembles the group Korea was in 4 years ago, with Argentina and Nigeria. Greece has been swapped for Bosnia & Herzegovina, which likely makes the group stronger considered how bad Greece was in South Africa. As in the last tournament, Argentina should be clear favourites (especially since Maradona is nowhere near the team), but 2nd place should be up for grabs.

Brazil appears to have drawn a relatively easy group that has no peer threat. But Croatia, Mexico, and Cameroon are all quality sides and there's no obvious minnow. However, that often makes groups easier, I think, because without a team that's basically a free victory for everyone, you can count on your opponents cancelling each other out. But if I were Brazil, I'd be worried about the fact that I'd very likely have to play either Spain or the Netherlands in the first knockout match.

It seems awfully convenient that both Switzerland and France drew into arguably the easiest group in the tournament with Ecuador and Honduras. Do I smell a Blatter-Platini conspiracy? This gets even more suspect once you realize how screwed the Anglophone countries of England, the U.S.A., and Australia got in the draw.

The amount of contempt and distrust that people have for Sepp Blatter makes James Dolan
look like Art Rooney

I'm really happy with Korea's draw in a group with Belgium, Russia, and Algeria. No group is ever easy, but considering that we could've easily been Australia or the U.S., we lucked out. Bad news is that if we do make it out alive, we're going to likely have to face either Germany or Portugal. But I think having the chance to slay a giant on the world stage should be relished, because if your team can't win the World Cup, the next best thing is to make a splash by playing spoiler and breaking hearts. I would love Korea to be the team that further delays/prevents the ultimate deification of Cristiano Ronaldo by keeping "World Cup champion" off his resume. Also, it's interesting how this group is almost identical to Japan's group in the 2002 World Cup, except instead of Tunisia, there's Algeria.

And needless to say, the U.S. got the worst draw of them all. Not only do they have to play Germany and Portugal, but the "easy" opponent in their group is Ghana, the team that's knocked the U.S. out in the last 2 World Cups. In fact, Ghana continues to haunt former U.S. manager Bill Bradley as they knocked out Bradley's Egypt in the African qualifiers. I often get irritated by the arrogance of some American fans, such as when they say things like, "The World Cup won't become popular in the U.S. until we win one," as if they're so entitled to a World Cup that they feel that they can grab the trophy without even really caring. Mind you, there are nations, like the Netherlands and Mexico and Portugal and Cameroon and Colombia and Ecuador, who have cared A LOT for a LONG time who have never won one. These fans seem to have cause and effect backwards. I also think that some Americans are hesitant to fully embrace a team sport in which countries like Ghana are legitimate peers, even perhaps superiors at times. Nah, they'd prefer to stick with American football and call themselves "world champions" even though nobody else plays the sport.

The undisputed best QB in the world, beating out all those talented
Russian, Egyptian, and Chinese QBs. Amirite?

But that aside, no national team deserves to be in such a difficult group with such arduous travel conditions in a comfy little place called the Amazon rainforest. But on the bright side, if the U.S. does manage to advance, it'll be a huge story.

5 Christmasy Movies That Are Way Better Than "Love Actually"

As you can probably tell, I'm not a big fan of Love Actually. Call me a grump, but you know the saying that underneath every cynic, there's a disappointed romantic? I think I dislike the movie because I wanted to like it so much when I first saw it, and I did enjoy it a lot the first couple of times that I saw it. Then I kept seeing it every Christmas and realized how full of shit it is.

Just a quick checklist of the things that bother me:

- The unbearable and cloying Pax Britannica patriotism in the Prime Minister's speech. Portraying England as some underdog on the world stage, even though we're barely decades removed from its imperial era and still to this day, things like British accents are automatically associated with wealth, class, and sophistication? And god, THAT MUSIC. Ugh. And fucking up geopolitics for sex is not romantic, just childish and selfish. It didn't fly for me in The English Patient, and it doesn't fly here.

- Poor Emma Thompson really gets screwed, huh? Where's her happy ending? Everyone seems to get at least something except for the middle-aged housewife.

- Never understood why Laura Linney's mentally challenged brother had to prevent her from hooking up with her hot co-worker. A contrived obstacle.

- Liam Neeson and his son sure got over their very recently deceased wife and mother quickly, huh? How heartwarming.

- That "best friend" sure was kind of a dick, huh? I mean, I understand the inner turmoil that must come with being in love with your best friend's wife. But did he really have to do that stupid title card thing? To me, it seemed like he was mainly trying to make himself feel good by doing this supposedly awesomely swoon-worthy thing and, therefore, become the great romantic lead in the movie of his own life. What if she liked that a little too much? What then? He could've just written her a short confessional letter and left it at that.

- London is one of the most diverse cities in the world, yet the London in Love Actually is still stuck in Churchill's time or something. Even in a freaking ensemble piece with no central character, not a single major character is a person of colour, unless you count the Portuguese, and that's really a stretch. Besides, they're just portrayed as boorish peasants.

But I'm here to be positive, not negative. Here's a list of movies, in no particular order, that I think do a better job of evoking the Christmas spirit than Love Actually. Only one of these movies is actually heavily centered around Christmas, but all of them have significant elements of Christmas in them.

Tokyo Godfathers

Tokyo Godfathers revolves around children, but I probably wouldn't call this a movie FOR children because it's about 3 homeless people in Tokyo during Christmas who find a baby in a dumpster. Led by the extremely maternal Hana (oh, who happens to be a a tall, ugly dude who's convinced he's actually a woman), the grizzled drunkard Gin and the troubled teenager Miyuki try to find the baby's parents and return the child to them.

The movie is very funny in both a dark and warm way because the main characters live such wretched lives. But they're also good people with complicated pasts, and as you get to know their stories more, you stop seeing them as these grimy hobos and more of a dysfunctional family that you want to see succeed in the end. You also get to experience the urban jungle of Tokyo, which not a lot of movies allow you to do.

Christmas Emotion Evoked: The spirit of friendship and family

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Most of this movie is not set during Christmas, but its big centerpiece, the Yule Ball, is. That's why it's on this list. I've always enjoyed the Harry Potter books more for the "normal" elements than the magical ones. The story of Harry finding a surrogate family in the Weasleys and in the Hogwarts community was much more interesting to me than all the dragon battles and wand fights (which, to be honest, look kind of stupid on-screen, don't they?) put together.

That's why The Prisoner of Azkaban is my favourite book in the series, because it's the first book where Harry's family story takes center stage instead of a cartoony villain and his super evil quest to rule the world. And that's why The Goblet of Fire is my favourite movie, because it deals with the awkwardness of puberty so well, especially during the Yule Ball part. Christmas at Hogwarts has gotta be pretty cool, and Goblet of Fire portrays that the best out of all the movies.

Christmas Emotion Evoked: The awkwardness of having a crush, worsened by the fact that all the snow and twinkling lights puts more pressure on you to do something bold and romantic

Catch Me If You Can

Home Alone is one of my favourite Christmas movies (I just didn't include it here because I thought it was too obvious), and I think that explains why I like Catch Me If You Can so much during the holidays. Because it's really a kind of grown-up version of Home Alone, isn't it? Neglected kid gets carte blanche (quite literally, in this case) to do whatever he wants, but he just ends up lonely around Christmastime and wants a family more than anything. Except in this movie, Frank's family doesn't get chaffeured to this house on Christmas morning by John Candy.

This is actually a pretty bipolar movie, now that I think about it. On one hand, you have the giddiness of watching Frank hoodwink all those people into thinking he's a pilot/doctor/lawyer/whatever. Then you have the parts where he's all alone on Christmas with no friends or family, with only his nemesis in the FBI to call. It strikes a good balance, and despite it being considered one of Spielberg's lighter films, I still think it's among his best work.

Christmas Emotion Evoked: The desire to spend Christmas with family while opening presents by a big fireplace... and the melancholy that comes when you don't have that

The Apartment

C.C. Baxter is the schmuckiest schmuck who ever schmucked. He's like Willy Loman meets Kirk Van Houten. He's an office drone at a soulless insurance company, and he's the type who'd eat TV dinners on Christmas Eve. Well, that's if he's lucky and actually gets to spend Christmas Eve in his own apartment, as opposed to wandering around outside as he waits for his bosses to finish using his place as a discreet motel for their flings with their mistresses.

It'd be a stretch to call this a Christmas movie, though Ms. Kubelik does attempt suicide on Christmas Eve and that's when the movie really gets going. But The Apartment does capture that sense of neverending loneliness that tends to fester for many at this time of year. For a really dark movie that presents a rather bleak world full of lies, corporate conformity, spinelessness, self-harm, and the rigid social hierarchy in which the top dogs get to do whatever they want, the mood is nevertheless endearingly optimistic. Maybe it's just Jack Lemmon's ceaselessly earnest demeanor or Shirley MacLaine's proto-manic pixie dream girlness, but somehow in the end, you feel that the tread-upon schmuck and the suicidal girl are the luckiest people in the whole city.

Christmas Emotion Evoked: Feeling like a lonely nobody, but with the hope that maybe there's somebody out there for even you

You've Got Mail

And just in case you thought I was a heartless bastard who couldn't stand romantic comedies, here's one! A lot of the appeal behind Christmas is the nostalgia as the best Christmases tend to be the ones we had when we were very young, and we spend the rest of our lives trying to chase those experiences again. You've Got Mail gives you a nostalgia fix that's so pure that Heisenberg would be proud. It has aged wonderfully precisely because it's so dated now. It's a contradictory statement, but the movie is now such a perfect artifact of the 1990s: AOL, Tom + Meg, the very idea that a books superstore is some kind of unstoppable business juggernaught... Listening to that dial-up song as Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan connect to the internet can't help but bring back warm memories of being a kid and discovering the internet for the first time. And not to mention the very quaint idea of interacting with an online friend with long confessional missives through email, as opposed to a "wut up?" on Tinder.

This movie also portrays one of the most pleasant versions of New York City ever, where everybody lives in cozy apartments and works in cozy bookstores and has cozy friends. There's absolutely no stampedes of pedestrians, even during the holiday rush. And actually, though this isn't an obvious Christmas movie, almost half the movie takes place during the Christmas season.

Christmas Emotion Evoked: Nostalgia, lots and lots of nostalgia